Lonely Christmas

Unremitting the christmas-tree lights glow.
I sat beside the christmas-tree & watch it glow in the dark.
Christmas songs that played throughout when the lights flickered.

Lonely stood this christmas tree,
alone I sat beside it.
We were side by side yet i can hear it crying out solemnly to me.

Hush now my dearie!
I tried to reassure her but as the wind blew toward us,
I couldn't help but feel so lonely too!

As i grow older, i get colder,
christmas became a loner,
i felt lonelier.

I wonder if God remembered the promise we made,
I wonder if next year's Christmas would be special?
I wonder if I ever knew what happiness was?

My christmas! How i feel so lonely!
My heart no longer lingers here,
My heart went away into a warm familiar crowd,
far far away ... ...

Mirror

This poem was written on the 29th of November 2004

I stare hard into the mirror and saw a vague image of a girl.
She came right infront of me,
Her eyes was wet with tears.

I stretched out my hand to wipe off the tears,
my finger tips turned cold.
Her tears was so cold.

She locked herself up in her room,
so alone, so alone... ...
The room felt so cold... ...

She was having the hardest part of her life,
that is,unable to expresss her emotions.
I shed tears for her.

I felt her thoughts,
I saw her thoughts,
she wanted somebody.

A somebody she wanted to call out to,
a somebody she realise she don't even know,
a somebody whom she needed so badly.

I touched her heart and felt the broken pieces.
That cold and empty heart of hers was dying,
it was left to cry forever... ...

I looked into the mirror longer,
and,i couldn't take such a tragedy anymore,
many a tear left my eye for this sorrowful little girl.

The School Gate

I left myself in the past,
the very last place my heart ever shattered,
the school gate.

That very day of a December,
we went our seperate ways,
at that very school gate.

I couldn't forget that look on his face,
his pride,
his smile,all put to waste.

Unspoken feelings i had,
unspoken words I've yet to say to him,
doubtful about what i have to say.

The way he breathes sound all so clear up to now,
the way he reacts,
the times he ignored me still lingers in my mind.

That orange umbrella he held on his hand that shelters me from sun and rain,
the kind of love that shook my heart,
the care that warm my soul.

A past that i'm to blame,
an incident that never should have taken place,
a treatment he shouldn't have received.

I miss those days when both of us felt so naive,
those days where troubles are miles and miles away,
times where fun was everywhere.

I felt all so loved but does he feel the same?
Again,
i am sure that he doesn't,instead, i guess, he felt hurt.

That Day

This poem was written on the 29th of November 2004

That day, your eyes sparkled like a diamond.
That day, your eyes captivated my heart,
that moment my heart pleaded with me to look at you longer.

I stumble over every word I wanted to say,
I didn't know how to express my emotions,
I wished I could hug you that instance.

I wondered how you felt that day,
your eyes wanted to speak but,
it shun me.

Many promises we made, one after another but,we never comply with any.
That day, you promised not to forget the promise we made,
however,I doubt so.

Will remember me?
Have you cherish the times we spent?
Did you enjoyed my company?

My words to you can never be spoken,
nor can it be expressed.
My friendship with you is unspoken.

Solemn Leave

I lost my kin,
someone who watched me grow,
someone i'll never get to see again.

I grieved over this utter despairing news.
Cry? I shed solemn tears,
i looked into the mirror and wept.

The distance between us was far but it drifted away when she left.
All to blame,the irregular visits.
How i wish i was by her side.

That very phone call I've made was insufficient to shower her with unconditional love and care.
That very Sunday,
she went away,not even a goodbye i heard her say.

To pray for you i will but to accept this fact,takes alot of will.
I doubt i'm strong this time.
Without a word,how am i to know?

Waiting to fly over was my dream,
hoping for you to wait,was my wish but,
i was too late.

Now, I couldn't recall your face,even your name.
Everything starts to fall apart.
However,the heartbreaking part was to know you're no longer around.

I stood rooted to the ground,
no tears flow out untill i was sober enough.
A thousand apologises will never make up for the years we've not seen each other.

I love you and hope you still love me too.
A thousand angels must have welcomed you and God must tell you i love you so.