Friend in me?

I found no friend in me.
A shadow storm has started.
I plunged into deep thoughts,
I begin to ponder.

Bewildered about my existence,
in the midst of the night,I sulked at a corner.
My puzzle has yet to be completed.

My impregnable sadness,
my weariness came to a halt.
Reminiscing,that's my ability.

An unspoken part of my life,has yet to speak.
In a way,no one will journey with me throughout.
I'm all alone.

Trust,what's that called?
The flame in me burning out,soon,
darkness shall rule.

Where have all my friends gone?
Where have all the beauty in life gone?
Where have all the things gone?

Living dreams

The day will come when all will be put into deep sleep.
Where one is suppose to belong.
I seek for more than what is found in the rainbow,
I seek for myself.

Puzzled maybe,but that's what everyone seeks.
For I believe I belong to somewhere even more magical,
more wonderful.
And that's in my dreams!

For i long not to awake in reality but,
in my dreams.
A somewhere I'll live much happier,
a tale longed to be told.
A dream come true.

My words are dead in reality & my soul no longer lingers here.
Dead, I perceive myself,in reality.
For i live in dreams,splendid indeed!

Yet to know

For thy seeds sown are destroyed,
for thy flowers have withered,
for thy love hardens.

For my heart made fragile like glass,
for my sight obstructed by blocks,
for my say is over.

Frightened and never shall i appear,
frightened to live another second,
frightened till i fall on my knees.

Yet to feel loved,
yet to stand on my two feets,
yet to trust again.

May it be when darkness cast it's shadow,
may it be when frail hopes of success,
may it be when failure knocks.

I suppose my life reigns in this order,
I suppose my life is breathless,
I suppose my unending questions will never be answered.

Art of the poet

Emotions play me day by day,
for one is deceived by my outer & locked out by my inner.
An art that cannot be spoken,
an art that lives in me.

Words are used to describe not necessary felt.
Maybe it's the downcast flames burning in me,
or maybe,it's just more that words can explain.
Something lonely that hit the corners of my heart.

Forgive my despair for it brings uncertainty.
The roots of my words soaked with negativity,but,
forgive them,for they are just meant to be.
Unexpressed begging for forgiveness.

My dying heart & soul longing to proclaim the answers.
Uneven are the feelings I jot down,
insecurity that binds together,
for the art of my own sense of belonging is searching.